"Surgeons have plans, where to cut, where to take out, where to stitch,and what to do there afterwards. Though sometimes, complications arise and it is not in the plan. And there you don't know what to do when your caught with pants down"
-Grey's Anatomy-
Its New Years morn, dark cloudy and amusingly free from the smell of used fireworks. I woke up late and surprisingly irritated. I think it is the hang over due to drinking too much alcohol or the strart of my withdrawal symptoms from caffeine. Either way, I'm really pissed out. Then I opened the TV and watched Grey's Anatomy. I dunno what came to me but I watched it even though I have stopped watching it due to unreal hospital environment, where the interns are busier screwing with each other than doing their rounds. Furthermore, they are surgeons! But heck, to pass off my feelings, I watched it, listened. Then lo and behold, there goes that catchy line that took my attention. I realized, after all that things that I have said and done during 2008, most of my short term plans are not going into place. Something comes up and messes my life, and trying to be flexible as I try to be, I usally finish the things that come up but not with the usual satisfaction. But heck, what did go according to plan in the first place? 1)I got to medschool, 2) I bought my own guitar. And everything went to shit after that. I couldn't stick to my study plan anymore, I couldn't keep some of my promises, I keep losing to myself, forgetting the follow through after all the efforts I made. I keep on saying I'll do better and yet when I feel down or utterly lazy I just hang up the towel. IT wasn't used to be like that, I never knew what made me become like this. Lonely, sad and utterly tired. I wish, someone could come back me up. Meet my other half to pull me up. But heck here comes aother line that made a punch in my insides, making me feel like a bacteria being engulfed by a macrophage.
"People do mistakes, its either we do it because we need to learn it so that it becomes useful when we grow up. But some people can't get that, so they do it again and again."
O given this pat mistakes, why do I still doing them? Example cramming, trying to ask/connect with women I know don't give a shit about me. ITts either I'm a masochist or I AM REALLY STUPID. Always getting hurt to the point of stupidity. But frankly, I think I'm over those things, I'll just go and finish my goals. And I hope this new year is not a just a rewind of last year.
-Grey's Anatomy-
Its New Years morn, dark cloudy and amusingly free from the smell of used fireworks. I woke up late and surprisingly irritated. I think it is the hang over due to drinking too much alcohol or the strart of my withdrawal symptoms from caffeine. Either way, I'm really pissed out. Then I opened the TV and watched Grey's Anatomy. I dunno what came to me but I watched it even though I have stopped watching it due to unreal hospital environment, where the interns are busier screwing with each other than doing their rounds. Furthermore, they are surgeons! But heck, to pass off my feelings, I watched it, listened. Then lo and behold, there goes that catchy line that took my attention. I realized, after all that things that I have said and done during 2008, most of my short term plans are not going into place. Something comes up and messes my life, and trying to be flexible as I try to be, I usally finish the things that come up but not with the usual satisfaction. But heck, what did go according to plan in the first place? 1)I got to medschool, 2) I bought my own guitar. And everything went to shit after that. I couldn't stick to my study plan anymore, I couldn't keep some of my promises, I keep losing to myself, forgetting the follow through after all the efforts I made. I keep on saying I'll do better and yet when I feel down or utterly lazy I just hang up the towel. IT wasn't used to be like that, I never knew what made me become like this. Lonely, sad and utterly tired. I wish, someone could come back me up. Meet my other half to pull me up. But heck here comes aother line that made a punch in my insides, making me feel like a bacteria being engulfed by a macrophage.
"People do mistakes, its either we do it because we need to learn it so that it becomes useful when we grow up. But some people can't get that, so they do it again and again."
O given this pat mistakes, why do I still doing them? Example cramming, trying to ask/connect with women I know don't give a shit about me. ITts either I'm a masochist or I AM REALLY STUPID. Always getting hurt to the point of stupidity. But frankly, I think I'm over those things, I'll just go and finish my goals. And I hope this new year is not a just a rewind of last year.
